Hair Loss - Emotions of Cancer Survivors

"When you lose your hair ... your femininity has been questioned ... " -- anonymous breast cancer survivor

Witnessing friends' fight for life after hearing the words, "You have cancer," has been one of the most painful and most precious experiences of my life. The reality of their journey hit home when their hair began to go little by little, or almost all at once.

One displayed the humor she would use to counteract her fear, "Yesterday I was washing my hair in the sink when, suddenly, there was a squirrel laying there."

Still another put her priorities in order, "If this is all I lose while I keep my life, I'm fine."

Other than a facial disfigurement, few events change your appearance, and your self-image, than a dramatic change in your hair. When the change is by choice, giving the look she wanted, a woman is thrilled. A bad hair day or a bad hair cut can cause an emotional tidal wave.

If only that is all she had to worry about now.

What if you don't know when your hair will grow out, or if it will? What will it look like? Will it be a different color, different texture, even new curls ... or very little hair at all.

Add the drastic measures to live, with the nausea and loss of energy, hair loss is one more assault pounding in the truth that life has changed, perhaps forever. Hair, "a woman's crowning glory," is gone. In addition to the cancer raging in her body, and for many the loss of one or both breasts, the loss of hair is the crowning blow.

Cancer support groups are crucial to providing care and information from those who know - - cancer survivors and health care professionals experienced in the emotional minefield of cancer treatment. The American Cancer Society (http://www.cancer.org) has a wealth of information and support materials on its WEB site.

You can help yourself, right now, come to peace regarding your hair.

Being pro-active, claiming your personal power, has immediate positive effects on your mind-body system. Your body responds with immune supportive chemicals as you move from "cancer victim" to "cancer survivor" to a deeper, more thoughtful you. As a survivor, you send out the message, "I'm here. I'm alive. I'm going to live life to the fullest." Everyday is a victory.

When hair loss occurs, getting your feelings out, instead of buried within you, frees energy you need for healing. There are several simple, yet powerful strategies to do this. All involve being honest about how you feel.

1. Look at yourself in the mirror. Yes, really look. You may have thought, "I can't stand to see myself," but, woman of power and strength, your loss of hair did not take away who you are. Speak out loud to that mirror image of yourself and tell her, "With or without hair I can still ... " and list all the things you once did with hair that you can still do without hair. List the things you have always wanted to do, but haven't ... and still can with or without hair.
2. Be honest about your hair. Sit down with a piece of paper and list all the things about your hair you didn't like. (You might even want to write a note of apology to your hair because you were so critical.) Next list everything you liked.
3. Write a "Dear Hair" letter telling it good-bye. Be sure and tell you hair you've discovered life was more important than it, but you hope you can be friends again soon.

Once you release these suppressed emotions, you can find your new look. Have you wanted to try natural curls? Now you can do it. Did you want to see how you looked with red hair ... do blondes really have more fun ... how about auburn ... or a really pretty grey ... perhaps your head really looks good bald ... or the beauty of a dynamic silk scarf?

Find a hair salon that has a computer program visually showing you what you look like with different hair styles and colors.

You are in the midst of a life crisis -- danger ... danger ... danger AND opportunity ... opportunity ... opportunity. You have the opportunity to re-image yourself. Take it. Make it an adventure.

Woman, you are a survivor ... Live it!

Cathy Chapman, Ph.D., LCSW is a licensed clinical social worker assisting people achieve their dreams of health, wealth and abundance through Mind-Body Psychology. She works from a spiritual and energetic model employing BodyTalk and Psych-K to balance the body and change beliefs. Click on => http://CathysGratitudeScarves.com <= to choose ultra-soft healing scarves that beautifully grace your head.